- My daughter asked me for a pet spider for her birthday, so I went
to our local pet shop and they were £2. Blow this, I thought, I can get
one cheaper off the web.
- My neighbour knocked on my door at 2:30am this morning. Can
you believe that, 2:30am? Luckily for him I was still up playing my
- My husband's been missing a week now. Police said to prepare for
the worst, so I have been to the charity shop to get all his clothes
- I'd never buy a Labrador - have you seen how many of their owners go blind?
- I woke up last night to find the ghost of Gloria Gaynor standing
at the foot of my bed. At first I was afraid......then I was petrified.
- The wife was counting all the 1p's and 2p's out on the kitchen
table when she suddenly got very angry and started crying for no
reason. I thought to myself, "She's going through the change".
- I bought some rocket salad the other day but it went off before I could eat it.
- Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy.