What's Amore?

When the moon hits your eye
Like a big pizza pie
That's amore.

When an eel bites your hand
And that's not what you planned
That's a moray.

When our habits are strange
And our customs deranged
That's our mores.

When your horse munches straw
And the bales total four
That's some more hay.

When Othello's poor wife
She gets stabbed with a knife
That's a Moor, eh?

When a Japanese knight
Used a sword in a fight
That's Samurai.

When your car doesn't start
Battery flat as a fart
That's a Morris

When overlaid satins
Make difference patterns
That's a moiré

When a sand-coated board
buffs your nails, yes milord
that's emery

Sam's got bulging trousers
But Ray's got six houses
Hmm. Sam or Ray?

When a survey shows
What you don't want to know
That's a MORI

Patrick's eye's gone awry
From watching the sky -
That's a Moore eye

When the mail I received
Made my eyes and ears bleed
Please - no more, eh?