PREVENT your milkman from becoming complacent by never ordering the
same number of pints twice, and hiding your empties all around your
M. Cooper, Leyland
TIE a fish on a piece of string, climb up onto your neighbour's roof,
and dangle the fish in front of his window. He'll think his house is
A bicycle pump used backwards makes a handy makeshift vacuum cleaner.
T. Elm, Hornchurch, Essex
GIVE your pet tortoise 'bull bars' by slipping the wire off a champagne
cork over his head.
J. Bobble, Tinsley
ACTION Men embedded in a half a grapefruit make 'extra large' Subbutteo
footballers suitable for adults.
WHEN holidaying abroad include a toilet brush and standard lamp in your
luggage. Hotels rarely provide toilet brushes, and the lamp will come
in handy for reading.
Mrs D. Patterson, Shrewsbury
AVOID backache from bending to pick your tomatoes. Simply dig a trench
four feet deep alongside your plants. Step into the trench and you'll
find your tomatoes are conveniently at chest height.
John Tagliarini, Sicily
AN old television, with a toaster inside, makes a cheap but effective
'microwave' oven. For making toast.
W. M. Low, Lowick
NEXT time you pop out to the supermarket, glue carpet tiles to the
soles of your shoes. They'll make Sainsburys feel like your own living