It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Geordie version
of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside of Newcastle.
If you have one of the Newcastle editions you may need some help
understanding the commands. The Newcastle edition may be recognised by
looking at the loading screen. It reads Windiz 98 with a background
picture of a Brown Ale bottle superimposed on a photograph of the Tyne
Bridge. It is shipped with the Brown Ale screen saver.
The Recycle Bin is labelled 'Aal ya shite'
Dialup Networking is called 'Me mates'
Control Panel is known as 'How te fuck aboot wi the settins'
The Hard Drive is referred to as 'Big disk'
Floppies are known as 'Them litil plastic bastads'
OK = it's alreet
cancel = fuck that
yes = aye
no= nee fuckin' chance
find = gan gerit ya fucking sel'
go to = owa there
help = ah cannit dee it
stop = divvent move
start = hadaway and shite
settings = settins
programs = stuff that dis stuff
personal folder = me shite
Also note that Windiz 98 does not recognise capital letters or
Some programs that are exclusive to Windiz 98:
tiperiter = a word processor
cullarin book = a graphics package
addin masheen = calculator
tunes = CD player
pikchas = a graphics viewer
toon = a spreadsheet of Newcastle United FC's recent scores
bevvy = local off-licences by area code and price of Brown Ale
tax records = usually an empty file
We regret any inconvenience it may cause if you received a copy of the
Newcastle edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement