There's these two French Legionnaires in the desert, and they've been separated from their unit and are lost. They've been wandering for several days without food and water when they see a big, bustling market laid out before them. They think it's a mirage, but as they draw closer, they can hear the stallholders' cries, and soon they are there.

So the legionnaires rush up to the first stall they see and cry to the stallholder, "Stallholder, we 'ave been travelling in ze desert for many days, tell us, do you 'ave a skin of water for us?"

The stallholder shook his head and replied "I'm sorry, French legionnaire type people, but all I have to sell is a load of bowls full of jelly and cake, topped with custard and cream."

The legionnaires look at each other, surprised, and move on to the next stall, where they ask again.

The stallholder looked at them embarrassed, and confessed "Gentlemen, tragic as I admit it is, I have none of the ingredients necessary for life for which you ask me...all I have to sell is this large bowl of jelly topped with custard and cream, with a little cocktail cherry in the middle at the top - look," he said, pointing out the glace cherry. "I cannot help you."

The legionnaires were really worried by this point, and they went through the market stall by stall, but each stallholder gave the same reply.

Resigned to their grim fate, the legionnaires walked off into the setting sun. As they did so, one turned to the other and said, "That was really odd - a big market in the middle of nowhere, and all they sold was bowls of jelly with custard and cream."

"Yes," said the other, "it was a trifle bazaar"